Far too many couples adopt a scorched-earth approach to their divorces. They sling barbs and accusations, abscond with community property and try to pit the children and others against their soon-to-be ex-spouses.
This type of strategy is sure to backfire, however. Even if you prevail in court, if you share children with your ex, you will need to continue dealing with them on an ongoing basis for the foreseeable future. It’s not going to be easy after a napalm-drenched divorce.
We encourage all of our clients to embrace a solutions-based approach to their uncoupling. By working together instead of against one another, divorcing couples can achieve a parity that would never be possible in an acrimonious divorce.
Of course, there are situations where litigation remains the most viable option. If one spouse has behaved abusively toward the other, it would be better to let the court be the final arbiter of the divorce decisions.
But barring relationships where domestic abuse occurred, most couples who are willing to commit to an amicable divorce can derive many benefits from doing so. For instance, just because your wife or husband was a lousy spouse does not necessarily mean that they aren’t a wonderful parent to the kids. Trying to punish them for their marital lapses by restricting their parenting time ultimately hurts the children the most.
Your goal should always be to make the best decisions possible for your children while also leaving yourself in a good position to emerge as newly single.
Are you willing to work with your ex to achieve the best divorce settlement possible? We can help facilitate the process of your divorce.