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Seeking custody of the kids? Read these tips first

If you are fighting with your ex over custody of the kids, it can be very stressful. Your ex may even be doing things to push your buttons and get you to react so they can use your reaction against you in court.

That's why it is very important that you say and do the right things at this critical time. A mistake now can cost you the custody of your children, so always think twice before lashing out in retaliation. Below are some other tips for those who are seeking custody of the kids.

Don't appear intransigent

If the court believes that you are not willing to work with your ex regarding the children's custody matters, they may award custody to your ex. Instead, demonstrate that you are able and willing to collaborate on issues concerning the children to bring about resolution.

Exercise your parental rights

Show that you treasure the time you have with the children. Show up on time for each visitation and make the most of it. While you may have to work during your time with the kids, your down-time should be spent with them and engaged in activities with them. It doesn't have to be super exciting or expensive. Simply sharing meals and checking homework reinforces your parent-child bond.

Understand that perception is everything

Something doesn't even necessarily have to be true to harm your case for custody. If your ex is able to shape events to portray you in a negative light, you have to be prepared to counter that with your own portrayal.

One of the best ways to impress the court is to dress for success. Remember that the family law judge has very little on which to base their assumptions about you. Your appearance in their courtroom counts a lot toward their first impression.

Heed your family law attorney's advice

It's pointless to shell out good money for legal advice that you later flout. If your San Jose family law attorney advises you to do or not do a certain thing, you can bet they have a very good reason for it. Listen to them.

Remember, too, that even if you do not get the custody arrangements that you wanted in court, you can always seek a modification later should your circumstances change significantly.

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