When people think of divorce, they typically picture spouses fighting tooth and nail for houses, money and child custody. In some cases, divorce does deteriorate into a fight. But animosity is not always necessary, and it may be in your best interest to work together.
During divorce, spouses separate their lives. It takes a lot of time and energy as parties divide assets, bank accounts and determine child visitation schedules. Why should you consider taking an amicable approach during the divorce process?
Lowering the economic costs of divorce
Even if you and your spouse have a contentious relationship, amicably dividing assets and determining child custody arrangements may be in your financial best interest. Litigation is a drawn-out process that increases costs the longer you battle with your spouse. It may be difficult to work together, but knowing that teamwork financially helps you may allow you to put aside your differences.
Finding an outcome that benefits both spouses
When you enter litigation, a judge decides your family's future. Despite their intent to make a fair decision, the judge has limited knowledge of your family, your history and how you operate. Only you and your spouse truly understand the day-to-day realities of your family and what you both need going forward.
Agreeing upon a mutually beneficial arrangement can help you begin to emotionally recover and put the pain of divorce in the past. When you start out working as a team, it is easier for both parties to treat one another with respect and not as adversaries. This is especially important for couples with children who will have to continue interacting in the future.
Lessening the negative impact on children
Child custody and visitation arrangements are one of the most contentious areas of a divorce. Try to overcome this by keeping your children's wishes in mind. You and your spouse want to split, but your children do not.
Remember that your child will probably want both of their parents in their life. Consider what kind of visitation schedule would make your child happy, and then step back and evaluate your and your ex-spouse's schedules. Work together with the goal of preserving your children's happiness, not just your own.
Speak with an attorney who can guide you through the decisions you make during divorce, and inform you of your options. A lawyer will be able to help you find an agreement with your ex-spouse that you can both appreciate. If you are unable to agree on certain aspects of the divorce, an attorney can also fight for your best interests in court.